How To Lose Friends And Alienate People

Taking time off from my Top Secret job designing rocket launch systems and lasers I stumbled across this ‘agency‘ and was super excited when they had a page that said thusly:

Screen Shot 2018-09-24 at 11.36.05

Alright! What do you expect Toptal?! I bet a super empowering message like “Toptal  expect you to be excited about UX and have really cool skillz and be a really cool person!” Continue reading “How To Lose Friends And Alienate People”


Companies House Beta .GOV Service

Companies House have some really good UX on their own website and as a limited company director I have no issues filing anything so it was with excitement that I stumbled across their new .GOV Beta service!

So how is it?

Uhhhh, it has a few issues… Continue reading “Companies House Beta .GOV Service”

UX Of A Robot Restaurant

I was in Taiwan recently and I went to a sushi joint where one orders via a touchscreen interface. I took a few videos because I thought the interaction was good; one could very easily screw this kind of thing up, especially the state of ‘chosen something to eat but not confirmed the order’. I was thinking “how would I design that?”

Fairly straightforward design in the end: choose item > item placed in editable queue > confirm order.

The confirm order step is analogous to telling a waiter/ess what you want and is final and non-editable as it would be in real life.

Anyway, here we go:


A really interesting talk by Tim Caynes about endovascular surgery

Yes, really!

A few weeks ago I went to UX Scotland where there was all kinds of super interesting chats and because I am a massive science dork one really caught my eye.

“Designing for visualisation systems in endovascular surgery” may be the hardest thing to say with a mouthful of Maltesers, but it also frames a presentation around how surgeons need very specific visual information during incredibly complex procedures.

Continue reading “A really interesting talk by Tim Caynes about endovascular surgery”

BT’s Website Is A Fcking Disaster

I have been a BT customer since August 2016 and I think I’m on fairly safe ground when I say the service has been … unique.


During this time I reported a few faults to BT. Let’s see how their website allows me to keep up-to-date with a fault.

Let’s start with the homepage which is a baffling array of shiny flashy things of little relevance to my requirements:


This page screams to me something along the lines of …actually, it just screams to me.

Anyway, after locating to ‘My BT’ I get a less noisy page where I can at least see some basic account information.


But rather annoyingly no call to action to report a fault; that option is in a drop down under the ‘Help’ navigation item where it leads us to this page, where the real fun begins!


I want you to pay attention to that bit in the lower right where it says ‘You don’t have any faults to track’ because I’m pretty fucking sure I do!

After following the instructions to click the Troubleshoot button beside Broadband in the left hand panel, I get the following screen.


See, there is a fault! Although it’s listed as a Landline problem and not broadband. So confuse! But I’m sure there will be an excellent clarification when I click the ‘Track this fault’ button lower right of the yellow box, right?


Aye, get tae fuck big man!

But let’s step back in time and revisit this panel.


Like those kids that discovered a secret world behind the wardrobe in the kitchen, I discovered a secret path to a world of fault documentation via a series of annoying intermediary windows!


It should be noted BT’s website has Alzheimers ‘cos its forgotten my phone number.


Aaaaannnnnd my account number.

After clicking Continue we arrive at Tech fault Narnia, Woo-Hoo!8

This is more descriptive and at least gives me hope something is happening; but if I’m being honest I am a broken man. A hollowed out husk of a human. My life force has been sucked from me and I walk the planes between this life and the next clinging onto what possessions I have left; two Babymetal T-shirts and a battered old HTC mobile phone with cracks across the front where I hit it with bloodied fists after getting so frustrated with BT’s ‘Service’.

I  think the only thing I can do is write a formal letter of complaint and close my account.

But what do you think? Are or were you a BT customer? Can you recommend me a better supplier? PLEASE!